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  • Writer's pictureMichael Holme

Falling out with people 101

Years of proselytisation attempts, originally towards myself, but later on, towards my second wife in isolation from me, have led me to break off communications with our adjoining next-door neighbours. They present as ostensibly upright Evangelical Christians, with previous professional backgrounds. That slowed me down in forming a more accurate appraisal of them. Charitably speaking though, I did extended the assumption, that they didn't hold the view I had, that in extreme cases, religiously converting one half of a marriage could lead directly, to the divorce from one another, of the two people in that marriage.

Some lesson quickly followed after I stopped talking to next-door. Firstly, and self-evidently, 55 year olds have much more to learn. Then of more value; we should reflect on any personal disagreements, fall outs, etc. For example, feeling angry or hateful towards people, costs lots of energy. It is better to be patient and give people chances, whilst all along, allowing them to erode your respect for them, in an insidious and effortless manner on your part. When respect has gone, you're handed a gift of disrespect, disregard, or even disdain; and it "just is". It needs no energy or maintenance.

Each new life lesson presents choices. Wrong ones might become clearer, if their upkeep is ultimately deemed too costly and energetic, especially after any denial goes. It's then we get to say, "... not doing that again". The adage, "back to the old drawing board", seems relevant here; or "if at first you don't succeed, try try again".

I feel nothing for next-door. Thankfully, they also seem to have stopped trying to proselytise us both.

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